Source: The High North publication, "The International Harpoon," July 3, 2000, published during the 52nd Annual Meeting of the International Whaling Commission held in Australia

G. Braks

“Whales are the roses of our garden,” declared Dutch environmental minister G. Braks in his opening address to the 1991 IWC meeting in the Nether-lands. On exiting the meeting, he was rewarded by Greenpeace with a Save-the-Whale T-shirt, which he immediately put on.

This was one of Braks’s last public performances. Shortly after he was forced to resign following revelations that he had concealed enormous overfishing. Furthermore, he had let farmers grossly exceed the quotas of manure they could spread on their fields - manure that seeps into rivers and ends up polluting the whales’ rose garden, the North Sea. Unlikely though the combination of whale-hugger and muck-spreader might seem, Braks was merely upholding a tradition among environmental politicians with sullied records.

When your image needs a boost and solutions to real environ-mental issues are elusive, there’s no quicker fix than a plea for the whales. Free “green” points are the prize, with no downside. No domestic economic interests are hurt, so no voters will be offended. And whale-hugging groups with friends in the media will ensure you get a very public pat on the back.

Ronald Reagan

No one milked more green points faster from fewer whales than Ronald Reagan. Hardly a champion of the environment, in October 1988 “Rocket” Ron heard of three California gray whales trapped in the Alaskan ice. Had nature been allowed to take its course, these whales would surely have died. But they were extraordinarily fortunate for no other reason than that the place they chose to get trapped was just 20 miles from a satellite uplink earth station.

Reagan frittered away millions of tax-payers’ dollars cooperating with the Soviet navy to save the whales in a globally televised extravaganza. The rescue operation involved two nuclear-powered ice-breakers and massive helicopters. Total cost: almost $5.8 million.

Jack Metcalf

Carrying Reagan’s torch today is another conservative Republican, Congressman Jack Metcalf from the whaling state of Washington. “Protecting whales has be-come one of our civilization’s most noble under-takings,” Metcalf told Congress in March 1998. His own contribution to this noble undertaking has been a campaign of vilification against the Makah whalers, including a court case brought jointly with Australians for Animals.

All very PC. But what of Metcalf’s broader record on environmental is-sues? In the words of the Sierra Club, Metcalf “has voted for almost every piece of destructive environmental legislation. He has voted to weaken our clean air and clean water laws,” and opposed the funding of habitat protection essential for the conservation of wild species. His “likes” include: keeping assault weapons (he has an “A” rating from the National Rifle Association), the B-2 bomber and tax havens for billionaires. In his last election campaign Metcalf even made cynical use of Makah-bashing to raise funds: “Your donation of $35, $50, $100 or even $500,” he pitched, “will help me win re-election and continue fighting to protect our whales.”

John Gummer

No one can compete with Britain’s former minister for fisheries and the environment, John Gummer, when it comes to invoking whales to save one’s own skin. Back in 1993, Gummer’s Parliamentary seat was at risk and he was desperate for some positive media coverage. In a speech in parliament he went for the usual save-the-whales tactics, but alas, he went too far. The press lampooned him brutally. “Delivering a statement about whaling, John Gummer made an impastoed appeal for the protection from cruel slaughter of himself,” said The Guardian in an article entitled: “Moby John gets that sinking feeling” (May 18, 1993).

The Times was just as cruel. “[I]f we were to launch this small ministerial cetacean into the North Sea, in wet suit and goggles, his love songs might attract the sympathetic interest of the larger sort of lady whale ... When he spoke of his worries for the little minke whale MP’s almost wept. Where can you get a Save-the-Gummer sticker?”

Tony Banks

British Sports Minister Tony Banks does not strictly belong in the company of whale hugging, muck-spreading politicos. But few can be more in love with whales, and he’s not shy about expressing his love if it means grabbing the headlines: “There is no human being on this planet more important than a whale, including my mother.” The same could be said of his hate for whalers: “If these people want some-thing exotic to eat, they should try eating each other rather than eating the whales.” (Save the Whale Rally, June 28, Glasgow)

Robert Hill

And then there is Australia’s Environmental Minister Robert Hill (see main article). Robert is miffed that the US Fish and Wild-life Service “ignores available scientific data on the abundance of koalas in Australia.” The US has listed the koala as threatened under its Endangered Species Act, but the listing “does not take into account the conservation and wildlife management strategies in place in Australia,” he whines. But when it comes to whales, it is Robert who ignores available scientific data and the management strategies of Japan, Norway, the IWC ... and, of course, the US.

An environment minister must walk a fine line in trying to stay popular with his constituents, since his job involves curbing the excesses of industry and imposing environmental taxes on everyone. But Hill assures his voters that environmental concerns should not hamper the progress of economic development. “We understand and support the right of industries such as fishing, oil extraction, and tourism to create wealth and jobs from our marine resources,” he said at the Coast to Coast “Beyond the Beach” Conference in March this year. “We also support the right of land-based industries such as farming and aquaculture to continue to grow and employ more Australians.”

Whalers are a different matter, however, receiving neither understanding nor support from Robert. And why should they? They live half a world away and can’t vote for or against him. More important, “saving” whales abroad brings in the green votes at home - the votes he was in danger of losing because of all the understanding and support he has shown industry!

Of course, if Ron were to try closing down the kangaroo hunt, this story would have a different ending.